Happiness and contentment are not moods, they are states of being that you must choose to actively create. If you want to find inner peace when everything around you seems chaotic, you must first realize the part you had to play in creating that chaos to begin with.
Where we mess up is in how we claim responsibility for our own state of being. Lack of responsibility leads to inner and outer chaos.
Inner peace is not an act of wild happenstance, but a finely cultivated garden that has been tended to with love and attention. It is not something you “find” as much as it is something you build with your bare hands.
There is no magic formula for automatically feeling at peace, because the events and circumstances that you are trying to escape are part of your world. You helped conjure them into being through negligent thoughts and an unwillingness to accept responsibility for your actions, mindset, and emotions.
While this isn’t necessarily a popular sentiment, it is nevertheless how the universe functions.
So how does one go about actually creating this inner happiness and serenity, especially when the world seems crazy and out of our power to control?
Carefully Tend to Your Mindscape
The collection of thoughts that you engage in regularly is considered your mindscape. These thoughts have their own energy and existence apart from your “brain,” and help shape the world around you through unconscious and conscious manifestation.
Your own thoughts can sabotage your efforts at creating peace.
For example, if you are feeling harried waiting in line at a supermarket or while you are stuck in traffic. You perceive others as moving slow or making dumb decisions. You begin to wish for everything to be peaceful, yet you are thinking negative thoughts about the people around you.
Your thoughts are charged and have intent. They will always dominate over loosely defined “wishes” and desires.
Often these desires, such as wanting “everyone to shut up,” are not calls for peace but aggravation born from lack of awareness. If this is the case, you are actively creating the conditions that are triggering your anger, because your ego needs these conditions in order to survive.
If you are not familiar with the complexities of your “thought garden” or mindscape, it can seem daunting to wrestle with. After all, how are you supposed to think clearly and weed out the bad thoughts in the heat of the moment?
This is why tending to your thoughts beforehand is so important. By practicing careful and aware thinking throughout the day, you will be better prepared when a situation arises that is undesirable.
Release Emotions That Don’t Serve You
Part of the reason why you might find yourself in chaos and discontent is that you are used to honoring emotions that don’t serve any purpose.
Many emotions are not derived from any particular place of importance other than your own ego. Those who say airy-fairy things like “all emotions are valid” are coming from a place of little understanding of what emotions are and why we experience them in the first place.
Of course all emotions aren’t valid. There are people who feel joy over the suffering and murder of others, who delight in the misery of the downtrodden. There are those who feel pangs of loss when their malicious deeds get foiled, and those who feel proud when they belittle someone or spew racism.
Emotions are biochemcial reactions tied to our thoughts, nothing more. They are neither valid, nor invalid. It’s your ability to healthily process them and derive meaning from certain sensations that benefit you and those around you that makes a particular emotion worthwhile or not.
With that being said, you must get into the habit of releasing emotions that don’t serve you. By holding onto toxic and useless emotions, you create the conditions for toxic and useless events to occur around you.
Every time you feel agitated, angry, sad, needy, lonely, fearful, or stressed over insignificant issues and mental phantoms, you essentially are building excuses for these emotions into your reality.
Low vibration emotions are mostly biological adaptations to specific stimuli that we no longer endure. These emotions have since been “hijacked” by our egos as a means of controlling our behavior, making us self-serving and vacuous.
To escape these toxic patterns of happenstance you must choose what emotions to honor. You must release emotions that put you into negative states or cause you to think negatively, otherwise you are committing self-harm and are breeding chaos into your life.
Focus on Your Self, Not Other People
When you are seeking solace from a tough situation or feel stressed out, the last thing you want to do is put the blame on outside conditions or wish for people to “act better” toward you.
You are the one generating the circumstances around you through unconscious manifestation at all times. Though we are co-creating with everyone around us, the energy that you encounter and directly experience, is very often the direct product of your own energy output and mindscape.
In other words, by “wishing” things outside of yourself were “better,” you are subconsciously telling yourself that you have no power to change anything and thus you will remain stuck in your current thinking patterns.
When you are feeling stressed and are wishing for inner peace, you must first tell yourself that peace is obtainable and that it’s okay for you to feel happy no matter what is going on around you.
You must consciously open yourself up to contentment and serenity. It doesn’t matter what is going on around you, it’s impossible to change the physical world and the people around you without changing your Self.
By telling yourself that peace is here in the moment and that no matter what is happening around you, you will be fine, you consciously create the conditions necessary for your thinking patterns to positively affect the world around you.
This may seem difficult in the moment, especially if things seem tough to deal with. Regardless of what you are facing, taking responsibility for your own serenity is the very first step, and it will begin to influence the events around you over time.
Do Not Create Attachment With the Idea of “Things Being Better”
This last point cannot be stressed enough. The second you feel attached and find yourself “longing for a better tomorrow,” you need to reevaluate your thinking patterns and go back to tending your garden.
Do not allow your Self to become attached with the prospect of “better things.” All you ever needed and require for happiness is right inside you, at this very moment.
The conditions around you have nothing to do with your inner contentment and happiness as a person or being.
You can live in a penthouse and be absolutely miserable or reside in a prison cell and have the whole world in the palm of your hand, with the smile to prove it.
Physical happenstance will always change and shift, not only due to your own thinking patterns but in the influences of the billions of other sentient life forms on this planet. You cannot account for all of the scenarios that can arise from their actions, so why would you ever tie your happiness to these random conditions?
This is a recipe for discontent. You cannot ever expect the actions of other people or the conditions of the physical world to “be better.”
If you stop to think about this, what does such a thing even mean? It implies that your entire current reality is “not good,” yet you created it and brought it into being.
Subconsciously, this is a train wreck. How are you supposed to find peace and control the Path of your own life if you are subconsciously telling yourself that what you manifest isn’t good and needs to be better?
You must own what you have and forget about “future” conditions. By releasing attachment to the idea of a “better tomorrow,” you create the conditions that allow a better tomorrow to manifest.
You must create the necessary space for a certain reality to manifest. These things can’t come to pass with attachment in the way.
Being attached or obsessed with hypothetical realities creates a mental roadblock that keeps you in a mental and emotional prison. This ultimately leads to discontent and suffering because you are never allowed to enjoy the present moment and be happy.
So the key to experiencing happiness on command and feeling content with your life is to let go of the idea that things are bad, wishing for better circumstances, all of it. Focus on your Self and allow happiness to set into your mind, rather than trying to physically conjure it.
The founder of Digital Sages, Matt has an extensive background in self-mastery and has authored several books on the subject. His goal is to demystify important esoteric subjects and help people transform their lives through self-awareness and personal empowerment.